


Things That Were, Things That Are, Things That May Be

by American_Punk_1990



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: AU, Alternate Timelines, But an acknowledged AU, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, back to Enemies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-07
Packaged: 2018-11-22 23:40:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11390823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/American_Punk_1990/pseuds/American_Punk_1990
Summary: Rey is training on Ahch-To with Luke Skywalker when one morning she awakes to find herself in bed with Kylo Ren, who insists his name is Ben Solo.





	1. What Is pt 1

**Author's Note:**

> **This plot came into my head one night and I had to get it down. Reviews are highly appreciated.**

The cool mist clung to Rey’s skin and several strands of stray hairs, escaped from the confines of her trio of buns, straggled against her neck. There was a distinct chill in the air and a scent that Rey had, over the weeks of training on Ahch-To, come to realize was the harbinger of a storm. She tried not to groan aloud as she realized that training in the morning would be a slog through the mud. Even in her small rock hut, which Luke had calmly built for her with a few waves of his hand when she’s insisted upon staying, the moisture was thick and oppressive, making it difficult to take a full breath. 

The small utterance, a breath of a moan, escaped her lips as she lowered herself down on her small cot, her muscles screaming in protest. Luke had pushed her further today than he had in past and even though Rey’s muscles had been conditioned by her hard life in the heat of Jakku, she was fairly shaking when she managed to get into a prone position. Luke had assured her that it was normal for even the fittest person to feel this fatigue. The Force, he’d told her, was, in those lucky enough with the skill to harness it, like a new set of muscles, and hers had atrophied from years of disuse. She’d tried to hide the full extent of her weariness from him, worried that his protestations when she’d first insisted upon his training, would find new merit in her sheer exhaustion. But she knew that, even if it almost killed her, she needed to train. 

Her eyes, fully adjusted to the darkness, trained on the tarp she’d tossed over the top of her rocky shack. Luke had apologized sincerely for the lack of proper housing and Rey had uttered a few words, hoping to absolve his guilt. Compared to many places she’d slept growing up on Jakku, this was a veritable palace, secure and mostly comfortable, but she hadn’t seen a need to vocalize those exact words. She and Luke spoke infrequently outside of his short words during training. Rey assumed that in his many years of isolation, he’d grown disused to his own voice and she’d never been one for unnecessary chatter, a fact that had seemed to grate on Finn in the brief time she’d known him.

And so, her mind, as it often did at night, turned to Finn. Chewy had given her a communicator and Rey had faithfully used it to check in on her friend’s status often. A few days earlier she had been given the same news as every other time she’d reached out to the base: Finn was stable, but not yet awake. Rey’s concern was mounting. The wound inflicted upon him for her sake had been fully healed, but it was as if there was something blocking him from returning to the waking world. A quiet, niggling voice in the back of her head told her that it was her fault he was in such dire straits and reminded her for what felt like the hundredth time, that Finn had now been comatose for far longer than she had known him awake and talking. 

She forced that thought to the back of her mind as she swung her feet off the cot and onto the floor. She braced herself into a crouch and used her legs to push off into the highest jump she could manage. As seemed to be her usual ritual now, she was going to push herself into a physical exhaustion so complete that her mind would not be able to plague her with such thoughts and she could collapse into bed and into the dreamless sleep of one too tired to think. Several minutes into this brutal treatment of her body, Rey heard a voice calling to her gently from just beyond the makeshift door of her room. Sweat trickling down her body, mixing with the moisture on her skin from the air surrounding her, Rey exited and found Luke a short distance away.

“Walk with me,” he commanded gently. Wordlessly, she followed him. They walked for some time before they came to a small grouping of rocks and Luke gestured for her to take a seat upon one. Once she did, he took the rock opposite her and peered into her face. His calm, blue eyes were unsettling as they seemed to pierce past his flesh and into her tumultuous thoughts. 

“I sense turmoil in you, Rey.” The statement hung in the air and Rey shifted uncomfortably, blinking and moving her gaze to the ground.

“I’m not sure what you mean, Master Luke,” Rey lied, knowing even as she did so, the action was fruitless.

“The bond between student and teacher is profound. It is not possible for you, at this stage in your training, to hide your strongest emotions from me. What is troubling you?”

Rey sighed, shifted her body weight slightly, and moved her gaze from the ground off into the distance.  


“I’m worried for my friend, Finn. He’s no better than he was weeks ago. What if something happens to him and I’m not there?” Rey could feel Luke’s gaze boring into her even if she was determinedly not looking at his face. 

“As your Master, I would be remiss if I didn’t remind you to put your faith in The Force and trust in it. But,” and at that word Rey looked up and into the blue eyes, now warm with understanding, “as a hot-headed Skywalker, I cannot, in good consciousness, ask you to do something that I, at your age, could not.”

Rey’s curiosity was piqued. “Master Luke?”

He laughed. The last Jedi, great rumored warrior, laughed aloud. It was a deep, rusty sound, as though the man had grown unaccustomed to making that particular vocalization. Perhaps, Rey thought, he had. 

“Many years ago, my Master told me that it was my duty to stand idly by and finish my training while my friends were in grave trouble. I disobeyed him, of course, because I was a foolish young man who was so certain in my own abilities that I was sure I knew better.” He held up the robotic hand, and as it gleamed in the moonlight, the fingers twitched slightly. “It’s how I got this,” he said, almost as an afterthought. Then he shrugged, a gesture that seemed very odd for a serious Jedi. “Typical arrogance. It runs in the family. Have you ever seen anyone tell Leia she can’t do something?”

Rey shook her head. “Good,” Luke replied. “They probably learned the hard way not to.” 

“Am I to supposed assume then, Master Luke, that I should stay out of it?”

“No,” the man replied. “I once trained Padawans in the old way and that led to nothing but destruction. If I had been more aware of the individual needs of my students, there would have been no bloodshed.”

Rey’s hand twitched. “You’re speaking of Kylo Ren.”

Luke’s face, which had softened when he spoke of his sister, was now filled with sorrow. “No. I am speaking of Ben, my nephew, my first student, the one person I betrayed above any other.”

Rey rose to her feet then. “How could you say that?” She felt her anger spike within her. Luke’s remorse felt out of place to her. “Kylo Ren is a monster. How can you feel anything other than repulsion for what he is?”

“Because he was mine. And because what he is now is partially my fault.” Rey opened her mouth and Luke waved his hand, asking wordlessly for her silence. “I cannot take full credit for his mistakes, but much of the blame is my own.”

“Why?” The word hung between them.

“Ben was always a powerful boy. He wore the skills of a Jedi the way one wears an old, familiar piece of clothing. It was never difficult for him and he was a great asset to me. I was so focused on the other, more difficult children that I didn’t see that the great power he held was drawing another to him. And when Ben came to me, confessing that he was having difficulty with even rudimentary skills, I brushed it off and insisted that he’d been nearly fully trained and that it was nothing he couldn’t handle on his own. I didn’t know that he was failing because he could no longer sleep. He tried to tell me about the voice whispering in the recesses of his mind, but I thought it was metaphorical. I did not realize that a Sith Lord was slowly weaving his way into my young nephew’s mind.” Luke’s eyes were now deep pools of sorrow, and Rey leaned forward, breathlessly. “I turned him away, and shattered his trust in me. That was the in that Snoke needed to truly break into him. There is only so long a young man can listen to those insidious whispers day and night before they start to make sense. 

Rey shook her head. “It still doesn’t excuse what he’s done. I watched him murder his own father.”

“He’s not innocent,” Luke acknowledged, “but he’s not solely to blame either. The Jedi of the past would tell you to deal in absolutes, but I can assure you that absolutes lead to the Dark Side. And so,” he added with a piercing look in her direction, “is that anger you’re feeling.”

The sky opened then, and rain poured from it, soaking Rey through to her skin. As she watched, Luke stood and turned his back to her, lifting his face up to the rain.

“In all my years away from Tatooine, planets where water is abundant still surprise me.”

Rey’s smile was genuine. “Am I mad if I say that I sometimes miss the sand?”

Luke laughed once more. “I’ll have to mention that to my father one day. He’d have a few choice words to say about that notion.”

Later, when Rey was back on her cot, her soaked clothes discarded for dry ones, she realized that they’d never come to a conclusion about Finn. She’d been so enraptured by the stories from her normally stoic Master that she lost track of her concern. As she drifted off to sleep, Rey swore to herself that she’d question Luke at breakfast when she awoke. 

 

She was warmer than she’d been in weeks. An unfamiliar weight, pressed around her middle, seemed to be constricting her groggy movements as she slowly emerged from sleep. When her eyes opened, she became more aware of her surroundings and with that, a realization that she wasn’t alone. She stiffened, wondering if she was still dreaming as she stared out at the broad expanse of a bed where it met a metallic wall. She looked toward the weighty mass against her skin and her blood ran cold when she saw that it was an unfamiliar bare arm. She sat bolt upright in bed, pushing away from the body in the bed with her and let out an undignified, and unexpected, garbled shriek. 

She had one quick view of a tousled head of black hair before the other figure was up and out of bed. An instant later, a green light saber was lit and the naked back of the stranger was to her as the man whirled toward the door in a defensive stance, light saber at the ready. After a tense minute, the saber disengaged and a hand dragged its way through the mess of hair.

“Kriff, Rey, I thought we were being attacked.”

The voice, thick with sleep, was familiar. Rey, her heart racing, was trying to place it when the man turned around and her blood ran ice cold. She was looking into the confused face of Kylo Ren. She didn’t think, only reacted, and she hurled herself at him, not caring that he was armed and she was woefully exposed in light clothes. She collided with his chest with a thud and heard the breath whoosh out of him in a wheeze. She felt him try to balance himself with her added weight on him, fail to do so and then they were toppling over onto the hard floor. She tried to strike at him then, but he easily grabbed both of her hands by the wrist and flipped her onto her back. He loomed over her, his face quizzical. 

“Rey, what are you doing?” He sat back on his heels, watching her with curiosity and she took advantage of her free hands and jabbed him in the part of the stomach she knew would cause him pain. His sharp intake of breath and widened eyes made her feel momentarily victorious until, in one fluid motion he was up, off her and pulling her off the floor. When she tried to attack him again, he threw out a defensive hand, stopping her in her tracks. Rey couldn’t move and she remembered Takodana and the fear that stung in her throat like bile. 

“Why are you trying to hurt me?”

“You’re Kylo kriffing Ren!”

His eyebrow arched. “No, I’m Ben. Are you feeling alright?” He extended a hand and Rey fought like hell to get free of his Force hold before he touched her. His hand gently pressed against her forehead. “No temperature. I’m going to send for a Med Droid.” She gnashed her teeth, hoping that she’d somehow be able to catch his hand, knowing ultimately that it was useless. He gave her an exasperated look before starting for the door. He pressed a button near it and into the speaker muttered “Med Droid to R-4. Send for Leia Organa, as well. She’ll want to be a part of this.”

He turned to her, studying her intently. “If I let you go, are you going to attack me?”

“Yes.”

“Then I guess things will stay like this until we figure out what’s wrong.”

A few minutes passed and Rey was astonished by how easily he kept her held like that. He seemed to be exerting no energy as he paced, impatiently waiting for the Med Droid. When the door opened, Rey quit glaring at him and tried to hide her surprise when General Organa swept in. She’d heard Kylo Ren ask for her, but never thought she’d actually be there. Following closely behind her was a face that Rey never thought she’d see again.

Han Solo


	2. Things that May Be Pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Reviews are lovely and always appreciated! Enjoy!**

Rey’s heart was thudding in her head so loudly that she could hardly hear over its repetitive thrum. She was cognizant of being spoken to, but the sound of blood rushing in her ears was overwhelming. Her eyes were trained on the very much alive face of Han whose eyes were narrowed as he gestured toward Rey. Quite suddenly, she could move again and, not expecting it, her legs sagged beneath her. She stumbled and when Kylo reached for her, she steadied herself and took a half step back feeling the side of the bed press into her, staying her backwards movement. 

“Han?”

The single word hung in the air for a moment before the older man cocked his head to the side. “Yeah?”

His voice was exactly as she remembered it, but as she studied his face, his skin looked less weathered and there was something about his eyes that felt very different. 

“You’re alive?” Rey could hear herself and knew that she sounded incredulous, but she couldn’t help that. Han chuckled and ruffled the hair at the back of his head in a nervous action Rey found fascinating. 

“Well, last I checked I was. You feelin’ alright kid?”

Before she could answer, General Organa swept forward in her no-nonsense way and placed her cool, gentle hands on Rey’s cheeks. “You don’t have a fever,” she declared as she trailed her hands away after a moment of evaluation. Her fingertips brushed down Rey’s cheeks in a familiar, maternal fashion. Rey couldn’t help but notice that the bracket-like wrinkles around Leia’s mouth were finer than they had been. Like her husband, Leia seemed years younger than when Rey had last seen her just weeks ago. 

“She’s been trying to attack me. Physically. And her force signature feels different,” Kylo interjected. “It’s more erratic. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say it felt like it did when I found her on Jakku.”

“You didn’t find me on Jakku!” Rey retorted. She noticed the looks being exchanged. “What?”

“He did, Rey,” Leia said soothingly, gently stroking Rey’s hair in a manner that was supposed to be soothing. “When you were just seven years old.”

“He brought you back to train with Luke,” Han added. “Even though I wanted to keep you after you fixed a part on the Falcon that I’d been working on for weeks.”

Rey shook her head. “No, I was on Jakku until very recently. I escaped with my friend Finn after the First Order tried to kill us.”

“Finn Dameron?” Leia asked. “He’s back at the base. He helped Poe escape the First Order’s slimy clutches after the pilot was captured on an intelligence gathering mission.”

Rey’s eyes widened. “Is he okay?”

“They’re both fine,” Kylo said. “Finn is actually adjusting very well. He and Poe are inseparable. I’d guess that there’ll be an announcement any day now.”

Rey didn’t know what he meant, but before she could ask, the Med Droid made its way in the room. Rey endured its poking and prodding without fussing and after a minute of analysis, it declared that she was perfectly healthy and rolled away.

“She needs to go to Luke,” Leia said reluctantly. “Han can take her.”

“No,” Kylo was emphatic. “I’ll take her.”

“Be reasonable kid,” Han started, but Rey interrupted him.

“I’m not going anywhere with him,” she pointed a finger at Kylo and tried to ignore the obvious flick of hurt that crossed the man’s face. “The last time I was on a ship with him he tried to kill me.”

“Rey, I would never do that-” Rey’s snort of indignation stopped him. He waited until she was silent and continued. 

“You can’t take her anyway, Ben,” Han interjected. “There’s still the mission to think about.”

“I’m not doing it without Rey,” Kylo’s statement was flat. “Do you think that I could concentrate while not knowing what’s happening? I can’t do it without her.”

“Ben’s right, Han,” Leia announced. “We’re going to have to postpone this until Rey is back.” Neither Leia nor Han looked happy with that knowledge.

“What is he supposed to do?” Rey asked.

“We have some intel about Snoke,” Kylo said. “You and I were going to infiltrate and attack. It’s unlikely that’s we’d be able to get to him during this first strike, but it’s a strategic message. Two Jedi Masters would be more than a match for the Knights of Ren.”

“You’re the Master of the Knights of Ren! Why would you want to kill them?”

“I am not,” Rey heard the first hint of a temper in Kylo’s voice. “They are despicable, corrupt former Padawans that went to the Dark Side. They forsook their gifts and became twisted.”

“You know who they are, don’t you?” Rey questioned.

“Yes,” his voice was clipped. He cleared his throat. “Rey, let me take you to Luke. The sooner we figure this out, the sooner we can end this war. The less lives lost, the better.”

The sincerity in his voice moved her. “Fine, but I’m flying.”

A slow smile spread across his face. “I wouldn’t have it any other way Fly Girl.” He looked as though he was going to leave the room to make the order to readying of a ship.

“Ben, are you forgetting something?” Leia asked. He looked quizzical and glanced around for several long moments.

“Put on a damn shirt,” Han said when Ben continued to look confused. Rey actually had to hold back her laughter when she saw the dawning realization that he’d never properly dressed after being awoken by Rey that morning and the quick pink flush on his cheeks spreading to the tip on the ear he’d absently tucked his too long hair behind. 

Leia swept back out of the room in her eternally elegant manner and Han followed, his own whooping laughter following. 

 

Rey tried to shove down her misgivings as Leia gave them further instructions. The idea of being alone on a ship with Kylo Ren still wasn’t sitting with her well, but she had a lightsaber tucked into a harness at her side and she was trying to clear her mind the way that Luke taught her too. She could feel a faint energy coming from him and she closed her eyes, trying to will it away. It was constant and she could feel a faint headache coming on from the effort it took to try to turn off her awareness of him. 

“Luke is going to figure this out,” Leia said, her sudden presence by Rey shaking her out of her reverie. “Just try to remember. I want my Rey back, and Ben needs you. You’ve been the best part of his life; I don’t know where he’d be without you.” She pulled Rey to her in a firm hug and Rey resisted the urge to admit that she did know where he’d be. She relaxed in the older woman’s embrace, feeling a pang of guilt tug at her stomach. The last time she’d embraced her, it had been a moment of sheer, agonizing grief born of the death of a man who meant a great deal to them both, but as Leia stepped away, into the easy arm of her husband, which he casually draped across her shoulder the guilt she felt intensified. Wouldn’t she do anything to live in a reality where Han was alive?

She felt something on the edge of her consciousness, like a gentle hand on her skin and she turn and saw Kylo watching her. He tilted his head to the ship and she straightened to her fullest height and did her best to hide her apprehension as she entered the ship.


End file.
